WELCOME
LIZANOVA GAZETTE 10.24.2009
LIZANOVA GAZETTE
24 October 2009
Volume 1 Issue 21
ADIEU GOOD FRIENDS, PARTING IS SUCH SWEET SORROW
Official Public Domain Photograph
JOHN McCAIN ADMITS, “I FUCKED UP BIG TIME”
TUCSON, ARIZONA (LG) --- Republican 2008 Presidential Candidate John McCain, Senator from Arizona speaking in the Sailor’s vernacular admits today at a local Rotary Club, “I fucked up… I fucked up big time…” in his presidential bid and he is sorry for the election of such a fascist leaning President Barak Hussein Obama.
“I have nobody to blame but me…” muses John “…even though I first thought to blame Rush Limbaugh… I’m the one who really fucked it up.” John repents, “I ran a morally bankrupt and incompetent campaign. Moral bankruptcy because I did not come out and stand firmly against Abortion-Genocide and I told folks that I was personally opposed to abortion but if the State court allows it then it’s okay with me…”. John recognizes, “How could any Roman Catholic boy vote for me with good conscience and remain faithful to the Holy Mother Church? They could not vote for me because of my impotent stand upon Abortion-Genocide.”
“I was incompetent because I failed to contrast my ‘conservatism’ with Obama’s fascist ideology, just because I feared bad press and being called a racist by the leftist media Washington DC whores I so dearly wanted to please. I feared the liberal press accusing me of criticizing the first black man running for president even though I knew that the boy was born in Kenya. By-the-way, Obama is not the first black man running for president as Alan Keyes kicked my ass in the 2000 presidential debates. I guess that you can say that Obama is the first Kenyan born American President.” remembers John.
“Yea, I admit it, I fucked up big time. I did not speak of Obama’s infanticide. I ignored Obama’s gun confiscation leanings, I didn’t speak of Obama’s tax increases and his hideous Obama health-care and his ‘Death Panels’ just waiting to strangle America with debt, I looked the other way with his known ‘cesspool’ politics in his home town of Chicago… and to top that off, any one of us Republicans who spoke truthfully of Obama I denounced. Hell's-bells where Republican Voters, and Rush Limbaugh was asking if I wasn’t Obama’s bitch? Then when I embraced the ‘Global Warming’ hoax I heard my Republican constituents wonder alound if, I wasn’t kicked in the head once too often by those ‘commie gook bastards’ when I was interned at the ‘Hanoi Hilton.’ Ha, ha I had a really tough time convincing Rush Limbaugh that I was a ‘conservative’ and the political satire that I generated on his radio show is priceless. Then every thing went to hell-in-a-handbasket for my campaign and a newspaper poll showed that American Voters believed Obama was the Pro-Life and tax-cutting Presidential Candidate not me.” concedes John McCain.
Concluding his remarks John says, “Seeing Eddie Kennedy die without repenting and renouncing abortion has me scared for his soul burning in the everlasting fires of hell. Maybe I better get my soul ready to kneel before our Lord Jesus Christ in my Judgment Day and work real hard to end this Abortion-Genocide before I die or I’ll be burning in hell with my ole Senate buddy-boy Eddie.”
The Pro-Life audience clapped and chanted, “End Abortion-Genocide Now… End…”
Natalie Donovan reporting for Lizanova Gazette from Tucson.
GABBIE’s ORAL SKILL & WOMANHOOD IS PRO-LIFE
VENICE BEACH (LG)--- Today our world renowned publisher and advocate for mother and child, Gabbie Grant hosted a brunch in the Lizanova Gazette news dining hall with food catered by the contemporary restaurant Sauce on Hampton for her company’s staff for revitalizing and renewing our commitment to the defense of life and to brain-storm strategies to end that Genocide called Abortion-Choice.
Gabbie Grant speaks, “Today my dear friends and employees we commit ourselves to the important goal of achieving for what this newsletter was created… to end Genocide-Abortion in our lives and forever do away with this evil. We at the Lizanova Gazette, the news division and a subsidiary of the Lizanova World Entertainment Network reaffirm our Pro-Life faith.”
I am lisanovalive member Jake Archerr and I am Pro-Life.
I am Sister Ashley and I am Pro-Life.
Yo, Ben B’donzki, I am Pro-Life.
I am Dave Dayz and I am Pro-Life, wait for my song too.
What matters to me today is Pro-Life, says Phillip DaFranco.
Shane Daewson here, U know that I’m Pro-Life.
I am Natalie Donovan and I am Pro-Life.
I’m Pro-Life Tweets Justaine Ezerik.
Gabbie Grant you know is Pro-Life.
Kassam Gee is Pro-Life.
I am Shey Karl and I am a Pro-Life father.
I am Ralph Marie de Largo and I am Pro-Life.
I am Lizanova and I am Pro-Life.
Ashley Moorehouse is Pro-Life.
I am Marena Orlovah and I am Pro-Life.
I am Mike Rock and I am Pro-using the Second Amendment to make everyone Pro-Life.
Katie Saah is Pro-Life.
Hi, I’m Natalie Tren and I am Pro-Life and wish Aussie-land had a 2nd Amend.
Mister X has a righteous Christian Rage for Pro-Life.
Hi guys, I’m Nadinee Zykora and I am Pro-Life.
I am the Servant of Servants Benedict and I am Pro-Life.
I am Jesus Christ and I created all life,… Yes I’m Pro-Life… Dah….Is the Pope Catholic?
I am lisanovalive member ___________ and I am Pro-Life.
Gabbie concludes her speech just before we eat, “I promise Almighty God that I shall use all of my oral skill and my womanhood to end Abortion-Choice and free this noble nation of the bloodshed of Genocide-Abortion. I am PRO-LIFE.”
I am Ashlie Moorehouse reporting for the Lizanova Gazette at Venice Beach, Lizanova Tower One.
HotFurWerdz
Today Stoo-dants I vant to introduce to you a kollege graduate with a degree in computers and a minor in business and she is my substitute teacher when I am abroad shooting svim-suit photo-pix on the world’s beaches and doing guest appearances on major television shows like Bill O’Reilly and Chris Matthews and talk shows like the Rush Limbaugh Radio Show.
Without further adieu here’s Nadine Sykora the U-tube talent of heynadine.com.
SPEECH… SPEECH… SPEECH
SHHhh Stoo-dants
Hey, Hi… I’m Nadine and I will be your substitute teacher and…
Hey babbie, U ever spread your legs to straddle a Harley Hawg?
Heynadine, U can straddle me… Ha… ha…
You boys are terrible… boo-ho… tears…. Cry… I’m leaving now… Nadine leaves the school-house…
OOOh, U naughty Stoo-dants… I am your teacher and I must discipline you. Now U all line up and I vill spank U vit my bare hand… pull your jeans down… bend over my knee…
SLAP… SLAP… SLAP……..
Ask Sarge
Well boyz, duty calls. I got orders for Afghanistan today. My Kommander-in-Chief President Barak Hussien Obama finally took time away from campaigning his death panels and his Obama health-care to the ‘militant’ Christian American people and Obama focused five minutes on the War in Afghanistan and the dying American Soldiers of my ‘Band of Brothers’.
The expert tactician and the war experienced soldier General Stanley A. McChrystal asked our President Obama for the commitment of 50,000 more Soldiers to secure victory in the Afghanistan War.
True to his leadership abilities in foreign affairs President Obama said, “I was elected the highest office in the land… I am the President… precisely because American Voters recognized that my experience at Community Organization in the mean streets of the City of Chicago gives me a unique perspective that no one else has… I respect the General but has he ever organized any community? No. He has only spend his entire adult life leading Soldiers fighting wars and shooting guns and destroying things… I am a Citizen of the World so I can bring people of the world together in peace and in friendship.”
When I wrote a letter to my Kommander-in-Chief questioning him about his troop strategy in the Afghanistan War, Obama wrote this letter back to me,
Office of the President of these United States of America
Dear Sarge,
No my fair American Soldier, God’s will I pray thee and yee wish not one Soldier more for your army.
I do not want my Happy Few, my Band of Brothers, all of you fools who belong to me, to share with me… in any way, the glory and Noble Peace Price Award and everlasting fame for my community organization of the Afghanistan neighborhood.
Sincerely
His Excellency Obama
Emperor of these United States of America
What-the-fuck?
My Seventh Cavalry Regiment and I, strong by 500 men ship out as soon as I submit my words here to Gabbie. U all give the US Army and my Seventh Cavalry Regiment all your Roman Catholic prayers. Guess I’ll see all U in heaven the next time around if you recite your Hail Mary prayers. I begin praying daily to our Lord Jesus Christ upon bended knee starting today.
Platoon Sergeant Mike Rock, US 7th Cavalry Regiment, AUS (Army of the United States)
PS I guess I could say that I love all of U, but that’s to fuckin’ gay.
Pray with Sister Ashley
Oh my dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
How do I say ‘Good-bye’ to all of you? Our Lord calls me for Missionary work in our President’s birth place of Kenya, a country in the wilds of Africa. I am dutifully following my Mother Superior to a leprosy colony to nurse the sick and serve our Lord teaching His Gospel. Oh, I so want for you to continue my work to end this injustice in our nation called Abortion-Genocide. I guess there is only one way that I can say it, “Good-bye and the Peace of Jesus Christ be with you all….”
Sincerely
Sister Ashley
Letters to the Editor
My Dear lisanovalive readers,
I am calling this the ‘Good-bye’ issue. Oh, not because I am going anywhere for I am here to serve you my precious lisanovalive readers and to serve our Lord to end Abortion-Genocide.
We are saying ‘Good-bye’ to Platoon Sergeant Mike Rock who received orders for Afghanistan going with his 7th Cavalry Regiment commanded by Lieutenant Colonel Custer . ‘Good-bye’ to Sister Ashley who follows her Mother Superior to our President’s birth-place in Kenya and to ‘Mr. Big’ who wants to hunt large game animals in the plains of Africa. He put his insights to words for the ‘Perspective.’
But I assure all you respected readers that we say ‘Good-bye’ this issue but next issue we hear, “Hi, I’m the new kid on the Lizanova Gazette. You’re gonna like me.”
Sincerely
Gabbie
Perspective
Well I’m proud of you boyz and gerlz for all of you joining me to continue to fight to end this atrocity called Abortion-Genocide. I am turning this gazette feature over to Mister X.
Good-bye my readers and my friends for I am taking my custom-shop Winchester Model 70 rifle with Schmidt and Bender telescopic sight and I am off to the African plains to hunt lions, tigers and bears, oh my!
Sincerely
‘Mr. Big’
Have Pen I shall Write
Short Story by
Ralph Marie de Largo
Episode Two continues this issue 21, Lizanova Gazette, Johnnie Yuma
“Drink boy… What you staring at Nigger?… you see a ghost?… Stop yo fussin’ horse!” I hear the Sheriff complain. My mind is focused, Jesus is the righteousness I kill by… I walk out from the bushes, I point my rifle muzzle to within inches of the horse’s skull, I cock my gran-daddie's Hawkin 50 caliber percussion rifle and I pull the trigger.
>>>Snap>BOOM<<<
That dumb beast falls like a sack o’ potatoes rolled off a wagon. I drop my rifle and I take the butt end of my Colt 1851 ‘Navy’ pistol with my right hand that I wear in a cross-draw holster on my left hip.
Oh shit, Jesus I’-a-comin…’ I see that lawman is big and he is strong and his eyes are aflame with vengeance. Oh, shit, Jesus I’-a-comin’ for I am a dead boy… fo' sees I, that lawman is fast handed on his pistol… clearin’ his leather holster before I…
>>clack>BOOM<<
Goes the Sheriff’s pistol… I hear the deafening powder explosion and I feel the scalding muzzle blast against my face from his firearm … I focus my eyes upon my front pistol sight and I aim over his heart… The smell of burnt powder fills the stall air around me.
“AAaaw DIE U DEMON SHERIFF…” I scream at the top of my lungs… My fingers and thumb are fast on my pistol’s trigger and hammer and my aim is deadly.
>>click>BOOM> click>BOOM> click>BOOM…click>BOOM I fire in rapid succession. I see this lawman’s blood is erupted from the forty-four caliber bullet holes in his chest… I feel the warmth upon my skin of his bright red blood splattered over my face and his vital-fluid soils my shirt… I see his left hand clench his blood-wet breast pocket… He looks into my eyes… I see outrage… his head drops… his knees buckle and he falls beside his dead animal…He is life-less… I shot the Sheriff…
“Whoa Nellie… It’s over. How many bullets does it take to kill one o’ these demon lawmen? Yo’ quick thinkin’ saved my life Jim. Though at the time I shot him dead I wasn’t thinkin’ that the bullets could have gone through the lawman and hit you… the both of you strugglin’ and you knocking his gun aside… No matter, Jesus saved us.” Jim and I stand alone on the road and we look down at the bloody corpse of a man who had dreams and family just a moment ago. Slavery… fuckin’ Slavery killed him… I think.
“Masa Johnnie I just didn’t want that lawman hurtin’ you boy. I just felt the strength o’ dat big-boy in da’ Bible he a’called Sampson.”
“As hungry as they be, one of yo’ kinfolk will find this carcass Jim and butcher and barbeque this horse and eat it fo’ sure.”
“Yea-sa Masa Johnnie fo’ every t’ing tastes good barbequed.”
“Jim, every thang’ does taste good barbequed… Mmm I’m a wonderin’ if…”
“Noo Sir Masa Johnnie, I-za knows wat youz be thinking now and it’z bad luck to be a-eattin’ a fellow…”
“Ha, ha… Jim my friend I’m just joshin’ you boy… Jim drag this ‘demon’ to that creek down yonder and fill his pockets with rocks and dump him in the water, oh and place this slab of bacon under his shirt too.”
The Sheriff is even to big a white-man for Jim and I to carry so Jim drags the corpse with the same rope that had once bonded him. I cover Jim’s tracks to the creek. Fuck it, all saddles look the same to me so I leave the saddle by the side of the road, some boy will take it for sure. I don’t have the heart to throw the lawman’s silver Colt 44 caliber Dragoon pistol in the creek so I stuff it in Jim’s belt with the holster. “We will need all the guns we can get.” I say to Jim, his eyes look white and his face is pale from all this blood and excitement. Jim stuffs the pistol into his haversack.
“Oooh, Masa Johnnie Yuma I ‘afered’. Ain’t no white folk gonna look kindly towards me if them see ole Nigger Jim wit’ a pistol in ‘is belt. I ain’t supposing ta have no ‘shootin’-irons as I a ‘Slave,’ dems da law done ordered by the Supremist’ Court in da land.” I look at Jim, he is as black as the Ace of Spades and his eyes shining white like two full moons.
“Jim those bastard white-folk in town already got you pegged a murderer and run-a-way Slave. Do ya want to dangle at the end of a hangman’s knot and squirm like a hooked cat-fish and squeal like a stuck pig or do you want me to teach you da shoot the likes of this here pistol?” My pistol in my hand feel as natural as a mama’s breast nipple in her babe’s suckling mouth but I know that he won’t say “Yes.” for Jim has the heart of a saint and he won’t harm anyone, even his enemies. Jesus Christ is all he lives for…
The rain starts in a Florida tropical deluge and doesn’t stop. Why do I think of my Mother now? If I’d have some soap, Jim and I can have a bath, tho’ we couldn’t get dry. I can sense what Jim is thinking and he knows my thoughts I’m sure. We’re fucked. We are on the run north to one of the free States moving painfully through the swamps avoiding the roads, we are an old Negro man and a young white boy ridding one horse. Now a swamp viper snake bites my horse and the poison kills my animal so Jim and I struggle. We wade through the waist deep stinkin’ swamp water. We make no progress sinking in the mud and slime and the mosquitoes bite us so often we look like red-welt swamp zombies.
This concludes Episode Two.
Do Johnnie Yuma and Nigger Jim make it to freedom?
Does anyone give a 'shit' that they shot the Sheriff?
Only two horses were harmed and killed in the writing of this story... snakes don't count.
The last Episode Three, the ending climax in the next week's issue 22, Lizanova Gazette... U stay tuned...
CLASSIFIEDS
HURTING after ABORTION?
Has anyone told you, “It’s OK to cry?” Don’t give up hope. It is possible to feel whole again after an abortion.
Call Project Rachel at 1-877-908-1212 www.ccdosp.com
KASTLE KEEP GUNS
We Specialize in 'Rabbit & Squirrel' Hunting, Sport, Self-defense and all your firearm wants and desires. Contact our expert Staff, Rich, Andy and Rick for your answers.
Phone 727-530-4301
EWTN
Deepen your relationship with Jesus Christ and join us at EWTN the Eternal Word Television Network, Global Catholic Network.
www.ewtn.com
GOA
Gun Owners of America at www.gunowners.org preserving our freedom and yours. Go to our web-site and find out about us.
NRA
National Rifle Association, promoting gun safety and education and defending the 2nd Amendment of our Constitution with daily vigilance. Contact us at www.nra.org and see what we do for your freedom.
Hey, hey ijustine... U won't have a police precision marksman rifle in .308 WIN caliber manufactured by Fabrique Nationale (FN) to hold in a pix and help "U get an iphone" if you don't support the organizations that defend and advocate the Second Amendment. The telescopic sight looked low budget... Did the rifle-scope have a Mil-dot reticle?
Copyright @ 2009
24 October 2009
Volume 1 Issue 21
ADIEU GOOD FRIENDS, PARTING IS SUCH SWEET SORROW
Official Public Domain Photograph
JOHN McCAIN ADMITS, “I FUCKED UP BIG TIME”
TUCSON, ARIZONA (LG) --- Republican 2008 Presidential Candidate John McCain, Senator from Arizona speaking in the Sailor’s vernacular admits today at a local Rotary Club, “I fucked up… I fucked up big time…” in his presidential bid and he is sorry for the election of such a fascist leaning President Barak Hussein Obama.
“I have nobody to blame but me…” muses John “…even though I first thought to blame Rush Limbaugh… I’m the one who really fucked it up.” John repents, “I ran a morally bankrupt and incompetent campaign. Moral bankruptcy because I did not come out and stand firmly against Abortion-Genocide and I told folks that I was personally opposed to abortion but if the State court allows it then it’s okay with me…”. John recognizes, “How could any Roman Catholic boy vote for me with good conscience and remain faithful to the Holy Mother Church? They could not vote for me because of my impotent stand upon Abortion-Genocide.”
“I was incompetent because I failed to contrast my ‘conservatism’ with Obama’s fascist ideology, just because I feared bad press and being called a racist by the leftist media Washington DC whores I so dearly wanted to please. I feared the liberal press accusing me of criticizing the first black man running for president even though I knew that the boy was born in Kenya. By-the-way, Obama is not the first black man running for president as Alan Keyes kicked my ass in the 2000 presidential debates. I guess that you can say that Obama is the first Kenyan born American President.” remembers John.
“Yea, I admit it, I fucked up big time. I did not speak of Obama’s infanticide. I ignored Obama’s gun confiscation leanings, I didn’t speak of Obama’s tax increases and his hideous Obama health-care and his ‘Death Panels’ just waiting to strangle America with debt, I looked the other way with his known ‘cesspool’ politics in his home town of Chicago… and to top that off, any one of us Republicans who spoke truthfully of Obama I denounced. Hell's-bells where Republican Voters, and Rush Limbaugh was asking if I wasn’t Obama’s bitch? Then when I embraced the ‘Global Warming’ hoax I heard my Republican constituents wonder alound if, I wasn’t kicked in the head once too often by those ‘commie gook bastards’ when I was interned at the ‘Hanoi Hilton.’ Ha, ha I had a really tough time convincing Rush Limbaugh that I was a ‘conservative’ and the political satire that I generated on his radio show is priceless. Then every thing went to hell-in-a-handbasket for my campaign and a newspaper poll showed that American Voters believed Obama was the Pro-Life and tax-cutting Presidential Candidate not me.” concedes John McCain.
Concluding his remarks John says, “Seeing Eddie Kennedy die without repenting and renouncing abortion has me scared for his soul burning in the everlasting fires of hell. Maybe I better get my soul ready to kneel before our Lord Jesus Christ in my Judgment Day and work real hard to end this Abortion-Genocide before I die or I’ll be burning in hell with my ole Senate buddy-boy Eddie.”
The Pro-Life audience clapped and chanted, “End Abortion-Genocide Now… End…”
Natalie Donovan reporting for Lizanova Gazette from Tucson.
GABBIE’s ORAL SKILL & WOMANHOOD IS PRO-LIFE
VENICE BEACH (LG)--- Today our world renowned publisher and advocate for mother and child, Gabbie Grant hosted a brunch in the Lizanova Gazette news dining hall with food catered by the contemporary restaurant Sauce on Hampton for her company’s staff for revitalizing and renewing our commitment to the defense of life and to brain-storm strategies to end that Genocide called Abortion-Choice.
Gabbie Grant speaks, “Today my dear friends and employees we commit ourselves to the important goal of achieving for what this newsletter was created… to end Genocide-Abortion in our lives and forever do away with this evil. We at the Lizanova Gazette, the news division and a subsidiary of the Lizanova World Entertainment Network reaffirm our Pro-Life faith.”
I am lisanovalive member Jake Archerr and I am Pro-Life.
I am Sister Ashley and I am Pro-Life.
Yo, Ben B’donzki, I am Pro-Life.
I am Dave Dayz and I am Pro-Life, wait for my song too.
What matters to me today is Pro-Life, says Phillip DaFranco.
Shane Daewson here, U know that I’m Pro-Life.
I am Natalie Donovan and I am Pro-Life.
I’m Pro-Life Tweets Justaine Ezerik.
Gabbie Grant you know is Pro-Life.
Kassam Gee is Pro-Life.
I am Shey Karl and I am a Pro-Life father.
I am Ralph Marie de Largo and I am Pro-Life.
I am Lizanova and I am Pro-Life.
Ashley Moorehouse is Pro-Life.
I am Marena Orlovah and I am Pro-Life.
I am Mike Rock and I am Pro-using the Second Amendment to make everyone Pro-Life.
Katie Saah is Pro-Life.
Hi, I’m Natalie Tren and I am Pro-Life and wish Aussie-land had a 2nd Amend.
Mister X has a righteous Christian Rage for Pro-Life.
Hi guys, I’m Nadinee Zykora and I am Pro-Life.
I am the Servant of Servants Benedict and I am Pro-Life.
I am Jesus Christ and I created all life,… Yes I’m Pro-Life… Dah….Is the Pope Catholic?
I am lisanovalive member ___________ and I am Pro-Life.
Gabbie concludes her speech just before we eat, “I promise Almighty God that I shall use all of my oral skill and my womanhood to end Abortion-Choice and free this noble nation of the bloodshed of Genocide-Abortion. I am PRO-LIFE.”
I am Ashlie Moorehouse reporting for the Lizanova Gazette at Venice Beach, Lizanova Tower One.
HotFurWerdz
Today Stoo-dants I vant to introduce to you a kollege graduate with a degree in computers and a minor in business and she is my substitute teacher when I am abroad shooting svim-suit photo-pix on the world’s beaches and doing guest appearances on major television shows like Bill O’Reilly and Chris Matthews and talk shows like the Rush Limbaugh Radio Show.
Without further adieu here’s Nadine Sykora the U-tube talent of heynadine.com.
SPEECH… SPEECH… SPEECH
SHHhh Stoo-dants
Hey, Hi… I’m Nadine and I will be your substitute teacher and…
Hey babbie, U ever spread your legs to straddle a Harley Hawg?
Heynadine, U can straddle me… Ha… ha…
You boys are terrible… boo-ho… tears…. Cry… I’m leaving now… Nadine leaves the school-house…
OOOh, U naughty Stoo-dants… I am your teacher and I must discipline you. Now U all line up and I vill spank U vit my bare hand… pull your jeans down… bend over my knee…
SLAP… SLAP… SLAP……..
Ask Sarge
Well boyz, duty calls. I got orders for Afghanistan today. My Kommander-in-Chief President Barak Hussien Obama finally took time away from campaigning his death panels and his Obama health-care to the ‘militant’ Christian American people and Obama focused five minutes on the War in Afghanistan and the dying American Soldiers of my ‘Band of Brothers’.
The expert tactician and the war experienced soldier General Stanley A. McChrystal asked our President Obama for the commitment of 50,000 more Soldiers to secure victory in the Afghanistan War.
True to his leadership abilities in foreign affairs President Obama said, “I was elected the highest office in the land… I am the President… precisely because American Voters recognized that my experience at Community Organization in the mean streets of the City of Chicago gives me a unique perspective that no one else has… I respect the General but has he ever organized any community? No. He has only spend his entire adult life leading Soldiers fighting wars and shooting guns and destroying things… I am a Citizen of the World so I can bring people of the world together in peace and in friendship.”
When I wrote a letter to my Kommander-in-Chief questioning him about his troop strategy in the Afghanistan War, Obama wrote this letter back to me,
Office of the President of these United States of America
Dear Sarge,
No my fair American Soldier, God’s will I pray thee and yee wish not one Soldier more for your army.
I do not want my Happy Few, my Band of Brothers, all of you fools who belong to me, to share with me… in any way, the glory and Noble Peace Price Award and everlasting fame for my community organization of the Afghanistan neighborhood.
Sincerely
His Excellency Obama
Emperor of these United States of America
What-the-fuck?
My Seventh Cavalry Regiment and I, strong by 500 men ship out as soon as I submit my words here to Gabbie. U all give the US Army and my Seventh Cavalry Regiment all your Roman Catholic prayers. Guess I’ll see all U in heaven the next time around if you recite your Hail Mary prayers. I begin praying daily to our Lord Jesus Christ upon bended knee starting today.
Platoon Sergeant Mike Rock, US 7th Cavalry Regiment, AUS (Army of the United States)
PS I guess I could say that I love all of U, but that’s to fuckin’ gay.
Pray with Sister Ashley
Oh my dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
How do I say ‘Good-bye’ to all of you? Our Lord calls me for Missionary work in our President’s birth place of Kenya, a country in the wilds of Africa. I am dutifully following my Mother Superior to a leprosy colony to nurse the sick and serve our Lord teaching His Gospel. Oh, I so want for you to continue my work to end this injustice in our nation called Abortion-Genocide. I guess there is only one way that I can say it, “Good-bye and the Peace of Jesus Christ be with you all….”
Sincerely
Sister Ashley
Letters to the Editor
My Dear lisanovalive readers,
I am calling this the ‘Good-bye’ issue. Oh, not because I am going anywhere for I am here to serve you my precious lisanovalive readers and to serve our Lord to end Abortion-Genocide.
We are saying ‘Good-bye’ to Platoon Sergeant Mike Rock who received orders for Afghanistan going with his 7th Cavalry Regiment commanded by Lieutenant Colonel Custer . ‘Good-bye’ to Sister Ashley who follows her Mother Superior to our President’s birth-place in Kenya and to ‘Mr. Big’ who wants to hunt large game animals in the plains of Africa. He put his insights to words for the ‘Perspective.’
But I assure all you respected readers that we say ‘Good-bye’ this issue but next issue we hear, “Hi, I’m the new kid on the Lizanova Gazette. You’re gonna like me.”
Sincerely
Gabbie
Perspective
Well I’m proud of you boyz and gerlz for all of you joining me to continue to fight to end this atrocity called Abortion-Genocide. I am turning this gazette feature over to Mister X.
Good-bye my readers and my friends for I am taking my custom-shop Winchester Model 70 rifle with Schmidt and Bender telescopic sight and I am off to the African plains to hunt lions, tigers and bears, oh my!
Sincerely
‘Mr. Big’
Have Pen I shall Write
Short Story by
Ralph Marie de Largo
Episode Two continues this issue 21, Lizanova Gazette, Johnnie Yuma
“Drink boy… What you staring at Nigger?… you see a ghost?… Stop yo fussin’ horse!” I hear the Sheriff complain. My mind is focused, Jesus is the righteousness I kill by… I walk out from the bushes, I point my rifle muzzle to within inches of the horse’s skull, I cock my gran-daddie's Hawkin 50 caliber percussion rifle and I pull the trigger.
>>>Snap>BOOM<<<
That dumb beast falls like a sack o’ potatoes rolled off a wagon. I drop my rifle and I take the butt end of my Colt 1851 ‘Navy’ pistol with my right hand that I wear in a cross-draw holster on my left hip.
Oh shit, Jesus I’-a-comin…’ I see that lawman is big and he is strong and his eyes are aflame with vengeance. Oh, shit, Jesus I’-a-comin’ for I am a dead boy… fo' sees I, that lawman is fast handed on his pistol… clearin’ his leather holster before I…
>>clack>BOOM<<
Goes the Sheriff’s pistol… I hear the deafening powder explosion and I feel the scalding muzzle blast against my face from his firearm … I focus my eyes upon my front pistol sight and I aim over his heart… The smell of burnt powder fills the stall air around me.
“AAaaw DIE U DEMON SHERIFF…” I scream at the top of my lungs… My fingers and thumb are fast on my pistol’s trigger and hammer and my aim is deadly.
>>click>BOOM> click>BOOM> click>BOOM…click>BOOM I fire in rapid succession. I see this lawman’s blood is erupted from the forty-four caliber bullet holes in his chest… I feel the warmth upon my skin of his bright red blood splattered over my face and his vital-fluid soils my shirt… I see his left hand clench his blood-wet breast pocket… He looks into my eyes… I see outrage… his head drops… his knees buckle and he falls beside his dead animal…He is life-less… I shot the Sheriff…
“Whoa Nellie… It’s over. How many bullets does it take to kill one o’ these demon lawmen? Yo’ quick thinkin’ saved my life Jim. Though at the time I shot him dead I wasn’t thinkin’ that the bullets could have gone through the lawman and hit you… the both of you strugglin’ and you knocking his gun aside… No matter, Jesus saved us.” Jim and I stand alone on the road and we look down at the bloody corpse of a man who had dreams and family just a moment ago. Slavery… fuckin’ Slavery killed him… I think.
“Masa Johnnie I just didn’t want that lawman hurtin’ you boy. I just felt the strength o’ dat big-boy in da’ Bible he a’called Sampson.”
“As hungry as they be, one of yo’ kinfolk will find this carcass Jim and butcher and barbeque this horse and eat it fo’ sure.”
“Yea-sa Masa Johnnie fo’ every t’ing tastes good barbequed.”
“Jim, every thang’ does taste good barbequed… Mmm I’m a wonderin’ if…”
“Noo Sir Masa Johnnie, I-za knows wat youz be thinking now and it’z bad luck to be a-eattin’ a fellow…”
“Ha, ha… Jim my friend I’m just joshin’ you boy… Jim drag this ‘demon’ to that creek down yonder and fill his pockets with rocks and dump him in the water, oh and place this slab of bacon under his shirt too.”
The Sheriff is even to big a white-man for Jim and I to carry so Jim drags the corpse with the same rope that had once bonded him. I cover Jim’s tracks to the creek. Fuck it, all saddles look the same to me so I leave the saddle by the side of the road, some boy will take it for sure. I don’t have the heart to throw the lawman’s silver Colt 44 caliber Dragoon pistol in the creek so I stuff it in Jim’s belt with the holster. “We will need all the guns we can get.” I say to Jim, his eyes look white and his face is pale from all this blood and excitement. Jim stuffs the pistol into his haversack.
“Oooh, Masa Johnnie Yuma I ‘afered’. Ain’t no white folk gonna look kindly towards me if them see ole Nigger Jim wit’ a pistol in ‘is belt. I ain’t supposing ta have no ‘shootin’-irons as I a ‘Slave,’ dems da law done ordered by the Supremist’ Court in da land.” I look at Jim, he is as black as the Ace of Spades and his eyes shining white like two full moons.
“Jim those bastard white-folk in town already got you pegged a murderer and run-a-way Slave. Do ya want to dangle at the end of a hangman’s knot and squirm like a hooked cat-fish and squeal like a stuck pig or do you want me to teach you da shoot the likes of this here pistol?” My pistol in my hand feel as natural as a mama’s breast nipple in her babe’s suckling mouth but I know that he won’t say “Yes.” for Jim has the heart of a saint and he won’t harm anyone, even his enemies. Jesus Christ is all he lives for…
The rain starts in a Florida tropical deluge and doesn’t stop. Why do I think of my Mother now? If I’d have some soap, Jim and I can have a bath, tho’ we couldn’t get dry. I can sense what Jim is thinking and he knows my thoughts I’m sure. We’re fucked. We are on the run north to one of the free States moving painfully through the swamps avoiding the roads, we are an old Negro man and a young white boy ridding one horse. Now a swamp viper snake bites my horse and the poison kills my animal so Jim and I struggle. We wade through the waist deep stinkin’ swamp water. We make no progress sinking in the mud and slime and the mosquitoes bite us so often we look like red-welt swamp zombies.
This concludes Episode Two.
Do Johnnie Yuma and Nigger Jim make it to freedom?
Does anyone give a 'shit' that they shot the Sheriff?
Only two horses were harmed and killed in the writing of this story... snakes don't count.
The last Episode Three, the ending climax in the next week's issue 22, Lizanova Gazette... U stay tuned...
CLASSIFIEDS
HURTING after ABORTION?
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KASTLE KEEP GUNS
We Specialize in 'Rabbit & Squirrel' Hunting, Sport, Self-defense and all your firearm wants and desires. Contact our expert Staff, Rich, Andy and Rick for your answers.
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Gun Owners of America at www.gunowners.org preserving our freedom and yours. Go to our web-site and find out about us.
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Hey, hey ijustine... U won't have a police precision marksman rifle in .308 WIN caliber manufactured by Fabrique Nationale (FN) to hold in a pix and help "U get an iphone" if you don't support the organizations that defend and advocate the Second Amendment. The telescopic sight looked low budget... Did the rifle-scope have a Mil-dot reticle?
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